Tar, Feathers & Heartbreak

"I want to be tarred and feathered!"

"Tarred and feathered?" I wanted to make sure I'd heard him correctly.

"Yes!"

"All right then. But how about you eat your lunch first?"

"Okay."

Paul was sitting across the table from me and my Mom when he made this announcement. I was feeding her a plateful of colourful piles of puree, which she seemed to be enjoying. My nose told me it was turkey, Brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes and gravy, although my eyes disagreed.

The brushing of teeth is not practiced here on people with Alzheimer's because it's traumatic for the residents and very difficult for the nurses. I think they use some kind of fluoride mouthwash, but clearly it's not too effective as within three years of moving in, my mother's teeth were covered with white marks and (they thought) causing her pain - so they pulled every single one out. It was a very difficult decision for my father and sister to make as my Mom was always proud of her pretty smile, but the results were nearly instant. She ate ravenously. No one had known how uncomfortable eating had been for her until then.

We'd made it to the chocolate mousse with whipped cream when Aussie nurse Sue visited our table.

"Hey Sue. So Paul would like to be tarred and feathered today if you have time in your schedule."

"Ah yes. He's been asking for that all morning. I'll check the entertainment schedule for this afternoon, k Paul?"

"Okay."

While talking to Sue I'd moved my eyes away from my mother and in that second she'd leaned in with her chin going for the bite of mousse I'd had hovering there. I inadvertently let my hand dip a bit, just enough that my Mom missed the spoon and got a bite of air. She lit up and laughed her own true laugh, and it warmed and pierced my soul at the same time. And then she was gone. She was here for that one split second and I kept hearing her laugh in my mind over and over again.

"I'm going on my honeymoon. Where should I go?" Rob, sitting next to us, asked Sue.

"Australia, of course."

"Oh that's a good idea. I can marry a koala bear."

"Ha! A koala? What would your lovely wife have to say about that?!"

"She'd say, 'You just married a bear.'"

Sue and I found this hilarious and I for one welcomed the comic relief.


On my way out after the nurses brought my Mom to bed for her nap before my Dad's daily visit, I could hear snippets from people's long lives being mumbled over and over. And just as the door was closing, one clear voice escaped behind me.

"I want to be tarred and feathered!"


I suppose that's better than drawn and quartered.

How Many Calories Does Housecleaning Burn Again??

Daddy's coming home today! WooHoo! Can't wait!

He's arriving at 11:25 P.M. so there's time - in between dealing with clients - to dust, tidy and vacuum, clean the kitchen and bathrooms, sweep out the garage, rake the leaves, pick up the girls from school, bring them to gymnastics, then go grocery shopping and prep dinner before picking them back up...

Text from Daddy: "We're right on time. See you at 2:25 P.M.!"

Oh shit.

My phone had been ringing all morning and I'd spent hours talking clients off the ledge - while dusting and wiping out sinks and any other silent chore I could manage.

You know how when you're cleaning or fixing something, it has to get worse before it gets better? Well I was at the worse stage when Nick's message came in.

At times like these you find out exactly how productive you can be in 30 minutes!

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Nick's now been home for two weeks already (in-between-semester break), which is why I haven't been writing. These days it's too rare that I get to spend an evening just hanging out and chatting with my husband. The girls are loving having him around but aren't thrilled about doubling the number of parental eyes in the house. ha!

Ahhhhh! Did I just say that? Unintentional! Ha! Too funny. Okay, so the girls are not too thrilled about the number of parental eyes in the house increasing by 50%.  :)

Although, truth be told, even with one eye he notices more than I do most of the time, so maybe I was right the first time....

Katniss, Keto and a Dozen Oompa Loompas

Eyeballs?

Why yes, they're my specialty.

I was surprised to find them on the list of things needed from volunteers for the middle school Halloween dance, but it was something I knew a thing or two about.

This is the first year I didn't help at all and the pumpkins turned out better than they ever have!

Keto, Goddess of the Sea, and Katniss from The Hunger Games

Cofmans, Sturms and Luthys

And, of course, the parents. This was the weekend before Halloween, at the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Not at all on theme, but when a dozen Oompa Loompas show up, no one questions it!

 

Four Glorious Days...

... with my hubby.

Nick is still flying a lot when he's not in school, and last weekend he flew Don and Kellie to Napa, California, and they very generously invited me. WooHoo!

So with Cayenne and Acacia staying with the Luthys and Sturms, we joined the Gosneys and a limousine full of friends and experienced Napa in style.

Our crew at Castello di Amorosa. 

Just enough glasses for the 9 of us!

Actually, the real tasting rooms were far more intimate and fun.

The castle has four stories below ground as well.

 One of the lads in our group works at a winery and we got an extra-special tour. So special, in fact, that said winery will remain unnamed because he would get in trouble. But I can say that the beautiful woman next to me in the vat is his Mom!

If you look closely you'll see spouts on the front of the stainless steel. He had a key that turned them and magically filled our glasses.

And to top it all off, look who joined us for dinner one evening!

(Sophie and Alan live about an hour from here.)

Good times!

  

The Dancing Queen

So what do you do when you're turning 46? Well, you gather your cronies, don your best polyester, and dance the night away at an ABBA concert of course.

It wasn't really ABBA, just a look- and sound-alike Swedish group pretending to be them, but the polyester was real, as is the 46 part, sadly. 

And we did dance the whole time! 

September 26

This was taken at the pre-concert party thrown by Katie (third from right) to start off what would turn out to be the most excellent night ever!

When Alison, our brunette (second from left) who looked more like ABBA's Annifrid than Annifrid herself, declared at Katie's that she would end up on stage by the end of the concert, we had no doubt she would succeed. But we couldn't have predicted the reason she she'd end up there: She ran into a friend of hers with Downs Syndrome who absolutely loves ABBA. Alison went backstage and got permission for them to join the band for Dancing Queen - and the crowd went nuts. It was a dream come true for this young lady - and a highlight of the evening for everyone. What a blast!

September 27

And, thanks to Cayenne and Acacia starting off my day with handmade gifts, and Michel and Ilona ending it at one of my favourite restaurants, the 27th was very awesome too.

There was, however, an important piece of the puzzle missing...

But he was there in spirit. Thank you Nicolas!

Sheesha's Day(s)

Hard to believe I've known this little girl for only eleven years. And even harder that she could've learned so much sass in such a short time! She's a quick study. 

She's also the wind beneath my wings.

September 24th

September 29th

After creating glass art masterpieces at Get Fused, we came home 

and enjoyed Acacia's cake: Julia Child's Mousse au Chocolate. It went over well.

Then it was time to search for the Easter eggs Cayenne had hidden around the yard.

The loot.

 They went from thoroughly sugared up to thoroughly soaked when someone broke out the hose during Capture the Flag. Luckily I'm friends with all their parents!

Good night sun. Thanks for the lovely day.

Eros

While in Cayenne's room this evening I stumbled upon a small piece of cardboard torn from a box. Written in her finest lettering were these words:

Kind
Intelligent
Mom

One of those moments where the earth stops revolving and something wonderful pierces your heart.